How to Release Stuck Emotional Pain and Find Healing

Have you ever experienced an event in your life where you have felt betrayed or rejected? Have you tried so hard to move forward and just "get over it," but the emotional pain feels stuck?

I have!!!

As a Christian counselor, almost every person that I meet with has emotional pain from the past, present, or both AND most of the time this pain is at the center of the presenting problem.

Can someone be a Christian and still have a sense of emotional pain that does not seem to go away?

Yes, absolutely! 

However, if you would have asked me that question a few years ago…I would have said…NO!

Sounds crazy to me now, but that was my understanding at the time.

Just a few years ago, I believed that because I had given my life to God by receiving Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior and Master that I was healed in ALL areas of my life.

Nope.

No brokenness here.

There’s nothing to see.

Nothing to look at.

Why all of this denial? 

Partly because I blamed the hurt or negative emotion that I was still dealing with on “the enemy.”

Now, do not get me wrong…You and I DO have an enemy!

His name is satan.  And one of his goals is to hurt you in your thoughts and through your emotions.  But…your emotions in and of themselves are not bad.  They are given to you by God...AND they are indicators of pain that needs to be healed. 

The Lord WANTS to heal all of it.   

Up until just a few years ago, I was very confused about this subject.

For most of my life when I encountered hard events that wounded me, I would work HARD at forgiving and forgetting.

I mean REALLY HARD!

I really wanted to move on with what God had for my life, and I did not want to get bogged down and distracted with heart wounds.  If the thought of the painful event would come to my mind I would forgive that person AGAIN and then make a decision that I was “over it.”  Sometimes no matter how hard I tried to move forward, I just could not “get over it” or “move past it.”

In my past…when people that I loved and respected hurt me deeply I would work diligently to forgive them, and honestly I really did forgive them.  With all of my heart I would pray scriptures over them and bless them on a daily, but still year after year if that memory would come up…here came the emotion with it.

Oh Boy!  I was really frustrated and confused too!

Forgiving them was not the problem.  The problem was that even though I had truly forgiven them for the things that had been done against me, the pain was still there.

STUCK!

I could not get rid of it …no matter how hard I tried just “get over it.”

PAINFUL, SOUL WOUNDING EVENTS IN OUR LIVES

This is a major strategy of the enemy.

When a painful event happens to us, a wound in our SOUL (mind, will, emotions) is created.

Now just to be clear…as a Christian this wound is not in our spirit.  Remember we are a three-part being: spirit, soul, and body.  (I Thes. 5.23)

Our spirit is perfectly righteous (I Corinthians 5.21), unbroken (Col. 2.10), and sealed by Holy Spirit (Eph. 1.13).

We know according to scripture that our spirit is ONE with the SPIRIT OF CHRIST (I Corinthians 6.17) if we are born-again.

So, since our spirit is one with Him, there can be no brokenness at all or anything lacking in our spirit.

In Christ, our spirit is PERFECT!

Done!

Jesus has checked that box for all eternity!

However, regarding our SOUL (mind, will, emotions) we see in scripture admonitions such as “renew your mind” (Rom 12.2), “possess your soul” (Luke 21.19), and “take every thought captive” (2 Corinthians 10.5).

So clearly, this is still an area that is in need of healing and restoration.

Because we live in a fallen world we have ALL encountered difficult, painful, even traumatic events.

Our soul (mind, will, emotions) is the place within us that we still feel pain from soul wounds that were created.

Jesus wants to heal these places of pain.

In fact, it is one of the main reasons Jesus came to the earth.

How do I know this???

LOOK AT THIS SCRIPTURE IN LUKE 4.17-18

“And He (Jesus) was handed the book of the prophet Isaiah.  And when He had opened the book, He found the place where it was written:

“The Spirit of the Lord God is upon Me, because the Lord has anointed Me to bring good news to the poor;  he has sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and recovery of sight to the blind, and to set at liberty those who are oppressed.”

Now, for years when I would read this scripture I thought Jesus was talking about the people who are really down and out (like people who live on the street, etc.), AND He is, but He is saying this about YOU and ME too! 

He wants to heal any and every broken heart.   

Check this out!

The word brokenhearted in the Hebrew from Isaiah 61means (actually 2 words)

1.  Brokenhearted (shabar) - to break, shatter, destroy, crushed, demolished, fractured, pieces, smashed

 2.  Brokenhearted (leb) - the heart, the feelings, the will, the intellect, conscience, celebrating, imagination, inspiration, wisdom

Jesus chose this scripture to explain what He was all about.  He is showing us that healing people’s broken (crushed, bruised, battered) hearts is a really big deal to HIM.

In fact…It was one of the main reasons that He left Heaven to come to earth and die for us.

Healing our broken hearts is a very big deal to Him!!!

Now this amazes me…

Out of the thousands of things that Jesus could have said in this moment as He is stepping onto the public scene and declaring His mission...

...Healing our broken hearts was moved to the very top of the list!

WOW!    

The Lord loves us so much, and He wants every part of us to be healed and whole.

ONE WAY TO RELEASE EMOTIONAL PAIN

You might be asking the question…

“How can I get healed of the emotional pain I have been carrying?”

Isaiah 26.3

“You will keep him in perfect peace,

Whose mind is stayed on YOU,

Because he trusts in You.”

Check this out too...

One of the original meanings of the word “mind” in that scripture is “imagination.”  So let’s put the word “imagination” in that scripture.

Here it is…

“You will keep him in perfect peace,

Whose imagination is stayed on YOU,

Because he trusts in You.”

Your imagination is a gift from God.  Of course, the enemy has worked hard to warp and mess up our imaginations, but your imagination is a gift from God to be used to help you and bring you closer to Him.

In light of this truth, one strategy that I want to share with you about how to release emotional pain that seems stuck is to allow the Lord to use your imagination…

What do I mean?

So, it may be something like allowing the Lord to bring you to a beautiful place in your mind…a beach, the mountains, a meadow with a clear, bubbling brook and flowers all around…whatever you need to see in that moment.

A place of safety and beauty.

As you "look around" in that place in your mind (imagination) look for Jesus. He is there.

Meet with the Lord in that beautiful, safe place and release that pain to Him!

...However that needs to look for your heart.

Release it to Him.  Ask Him to help you encounter Him in this way so that you can be free.

Here's an example:

Once I met with Jesus (or God the Father...whatever seems right to your heart) in a meadow that had pretty little purple flowers growing all around. We were sitting on a bench together. There was a clear, cold, little brook near us. After I released some painful things to Jesus in that beautiful place, Jesus and I put our feet in the little brook. It was cold and so refreshing. Then we watched these beautiful fish that we saw swimming around. They were multi-colored almost like stained-glass windows. (Later, as I was processing my time with Him, The Lord spoke to me about the significance of those beautiful fish that He was showing me in my imagination. I will never forget what He said to me!!!)

Try not to rush this process.  Make sure you have plenty of time to really lean in to this.

After you feel you have released the pain, then ask Holy Spirit to fill that part of your heart back up with His power and glory.

This is a strategy I have personally used in my own life MANY TIMES, and also as I work with my clients in my Christian counseling practice.

It has been extremely effective.

I hope this is a blessing to you and helps you enjoy more freedom in your life!

Much love,

Christy